Wednesday, October 23, 2013

changes

 I have to admit - I'm not good with change. I like routine. Predictability.
I'm sure a lot of people feel this way. It makes one feel safe and comfortable.


 But I also know that in certain cases, change can be good. It gets us
out of our rut. Makes life a little more exciting. Gives us a new perspective.
For me, change comes in little ways. I'll try a new dish at a restaurant. Or,
I'll get a little braver with my hair color - a bit darker or more highlights.


My husband, Brian has been out of town at a work conference the past few days.
I know this isn't a big deal to some of you, as having a spouse or partner out of town
for weeks - or even months at a time - is your "normal". But in my little world, even a
few days is unsettling. In Brian's line of work, he rarely travels. So I'm used to 
having him home from work every evening. We have dinner, we play a board game
 such as Backgammon or Rummikub, we take our evening walk around the 
neighborhood, we watch Wheel of Fortune. Boring? Perhaps. 
Comfortable and predictable? Absolutely.

I'm an introvert, so I've always relished my alone time during the day. I have my
daily routine, do some housework and laundry, run errands, work on projects,
go to appointments, meet with friends. But evening and nights are a different story.
 I like Brian here by my side. Where he's supposed to be and usually is. It made me
 think of how it would feel if he passed away and wasn't here anymore
forever. I guess it's natural that those thoughts go through my head...we're in
our early 50's and Brian's mom passed away when she was only 51. And my
mother became a widow when she was only 57 (my dad was 63). We've already
lost a son ~ so I'm well aware of how death can snatch a loved one away when
they're way too young.


Before I get too doom and gloom on all of you, I'm happy to say that Brian's
on his way home right now. I will make chicken enchiladas for dinner and we'll
play Backgammon, take a walk, and watch Wheel of Fortune. All will be comfy
and "right" in my little corner of the world again.


 Bonus? Tim is coming home from university for a visit this weekend!


22 comments:

  1. Hi Melanie; I am so glad all will be right in your world in a few hours. I to don't like change I like things to be the same always. Yes boring but it is also very safe and cozy! Love and Hugs Nana. PS Your tree is just beautiful! Safe travels to Brian.

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    1. Thank you, Nana! Brian is now home, safe and sound. The tree belongs to my neighbor across the street. I look forward to seeing it change colors every fall.

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  2. I actually like when Greg goes out of town for a night or two since I get so little alone time. I don't have to cook, get control of the TV remote or just shut the TV off, and don't have to tiptoe around when I get up early in the morning.
    He likes when I go visit my brother or sister - he gets to eat frozen cr*p food and doesn't have me complaining about the boring TV shows he wants to watch.
    We talk on the phone each day to check in with each other, but Greg hates the phone, so no long romantic chats. LOL.
    All of this is okay, because we do come home to each other. I cannot fathom having it that way permanently.
    Glad that Brian is on his way home and all will be right in your world once again.

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    Replies
    1. I can totally understand about you liking when Greg goes out of town since your house is always full! I would definitely look forward to the quiet, alone time then. No long, romantic talks on the phone for Brian and I either...I'm the one who hates the phone. Like you and Greg, just some checking in.

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  3. Melanie,
    Your tree is glorious! Such an amazing color-we just don't get colors like this in our state-
    I know some of the feelings you are writing of-losing my sister and being a cancer survivor has heightened my awareness of the preciousness of life. I too like the safety of what some people would call boring!
    jemma

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    1. My neighbor's maple tree is THE prettiest tree in the neighborhood. There's some others that are a lighter red and some yellows, but this one is truly outstanding. I remember many years ago when it was first planted. I think when we (unfortunately) experience things such as a serious illness or death in the family, it makes our safety net even more precious.

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  4. Blog hopped and found you, what a beautiful tree and I loved reading your blog..I shall be back!
    Happy days and blessings
    Chris

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    Replies
    1. I am so glad you found my blog, Chris - and more importantly, that you will be back! Thank you.

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  5. I liked your post . . . I will think of you the next time I see Wheel of Fortune . . . Routine is predictable, I like it too . . . although I find change like in the tree leaf changes kinda fun too. (Great color change tree photos!)

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    1. Jeopardy is actually my favorite TV game; Wheel is second. ;-)

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  6. I understand. As you know, Don and I have had to be apart a lot this year. Our favorite thing is our evenings together. Just having dinner, sitting together on the sofa, maybe watching a movie. Nothing big, but so, so important.

    xo
    Claudia

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    1. Absolutely, Claudia! I think we realize it more as we grow older, too. I was actually thinking of you while I was writing this post. I know you and Don are separated often - and for long lengths of time, too.

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  7. What a beautiful tree!

    I actually look forward to my husband going away on business. It's nice to be able to do what you want when you want and know that it's temporary :)

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    1. I love my neighbor's maple tree...so beautiful. Don't forget - I have an empty household all day, every day. So I get to do what I want, when I want from the moment I wake up until 4 PM every day. ;-)

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  8. I adore Fall's vibrant colors and the crispness of the air! The pictures of your tree are awesome!

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  9. Change is good - but routine is good too. I am a homebody but love getting out for a good party. My hubs and I have our "boring" routines that we love too. Enjoy and fabulous pics of fall - my fave season!
    Kelly

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    1. That pretty much sounds like me - mostly a homebody but I do like going out for a good party (love family or friend get-togethers) once in awhile.

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  10. Melanie,

    Your beautiful tree is also going through changes! It changes from one season to the next with brilliant, fiery colour at present. Soon, it will be bare, but still possess a different beauty; snow will settled on its gnarly branches, like loving hands which are able to cradle the blanket of white on them. Yes, life is full of changes, and I am a firm believer that change is necessary for renewal, rejuvenation and appreciation for past experiences and anticipation for future ones. You and Brian are lucky to be so comfortable and close to one another. I truly sense that you are best friends, and THAT is something I know will NEVER change!

    xo
    Poppy

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    Replies
    1. Well, I wish that beautiful tree was mine, but it really belongs to my neighbor across the street. And, you're right, it will be bare in no time. It's very windy today and the leaves are blowing off the trees like crazy. I do indeed feel lucky and blessed that Brian and I have such a good marriage - 29 years and still going strong! :-)

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  11. That tree is just stunningly beautiful. One of the best parts of living in Canada is seeing the trees change colours. God's creation is wonderful.

    I am with you on change. I like things to stay the same.

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  12. Those life changing moments, like you losing Phil, and my Brian having a heart attack, makes everything in life so very precious. You enjoy having that hubby at home every night, and never apologize. As you know, my Brian travels extensively, and while I enjoy time to myself, it gets a bit lonely at times. We are both independent souls, I'm often away from him too with all of my choirs and hobbies. But it makes our times together very sweet, no matter how mundane.

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