Tuesday, March 22, 2016

who has your back

 The weekend started out wonderfully. My first best friend, whom I've known since I was just three years old, had her annual girlfriend's spring solstice dinner on Saturday. I always leave my house early to check out some of the stores in my friend's city neighborhood before going to her house. The city streets were crowded and I couldn't find a parking spot, so I parked on a side street and then enjoyed a long, brisk walk to the stores. It was so different walking amongst throngs of people and noisy streets full of honking cars and buses than the quiet country streets I'm used to. I enjoyed the change of pace for the time being, but I know I couldn't live in that kind of environment.

I went into a small Mediterranean grocery store and came out with all kinds of goodies: homemade pita bread, dolma (vegetarian stuffed grape leaves), tabbouleh, olives, eggplant dip, and spinach and feta stuffed pies. I also went to one of my favorite resale stores...I'm always more enamored with the architecture and ambiance of this place than what they have for sale. This resale shop is in a 1915 building that used to be a theater.

It was then on to the gathering of beautiful women and a lovely feast. We keep the food healthy and vegan and the wine and laughter (and sometimes tears) flow. Of course, being a gathering of women, we talk about anything and everything. It's a safe place to share intimacies and feel uplifted and supported by friends who love you unconditionally.

After getting home late and finally making it into bed, little did I know that the start to my wonderful weekend would change in an instant. Just two hours into my sleep, my phone rang. It was my son, calling me to tell me some bad news. I don't want to put the details of his news out on a public forum...he is fine physically, so no worries about that. But it was something that shook me up so badly, that I couldn't sleep. Especially when he kept calling me every hour to rant and rave and cry. He's had a tough 2016 so far with really crappy things happening to him. On top of it, hubby is having some genetic testing done today that might result in some scary news.

Sunday dawned and having had only two hours of sleep, I basically fed the cats, did some laundry and not much else. I stayed in my pajamas and read the Sunday paper. Mom surprised me by coming over in the afternoon to give me love and support. She stayed a couple of hours and it really helped. I felt better after she left. If you're reading this, thank you, Mom. 

On Monday, the sun came out and I took a walk around my neighborhood. There is something about the sunshine and fresh air that makes you feel a little better. Lilies and daffodils are making their way out of the soil, the lilac bushes are budding, and the robins are back, hopping their fat, orange-breasted bodies all over the place.

In the meantime, I received supportive messages from friends, and even an offer of help from a woman that I worked with years ago and see only one-two times a year. On the other hand, those whom I expected messages from never said a word. Funny how life works that way sometimes, isn't it? 

We met up with T last night for dinner at a restaurant halfway between our house and his residence at school. It was so good to see him and hug him and for the three of us to be able to talk in person. We reassured him that the three of us were a team and that we'd always have his back. The three of us have been through much worse: the death of our oldest son/T's brother back in September 2009. If we can make it through that, we can make it through anything, right?

 We also received a bit of positive news regarding the incident that happened to T, so all our hearts were a bit lighter.

I woke up this morning to find this message from my T on Facebook:

"Life has been kicking me while I'm down lately. But I am very thankful for all my friends and family that have been supporting me along the way, especially my parents. Without them in my life I would be nothing. When you think life is at its worst, just remember all the good things you have that other people might not."


With gratitude for all my blogger friends, too. Thank you.

Sharing at Cozy Little House Tweak it Tuesday.


  1. Melanie, you are in my heart and prayers - hoping your week gets a heck of a lot better, my friend xo

  2. Looks all well ans splendid. Hang in there and best wishes!

  3. Oh,Melanie. I am so sorry you are dealing with issues with your son. It is so hard to see our kids suffer. You just wish they were little sometimes and you could pull them onto your lap and kiss their 'boo-boo's' away.
    My heart aches every time I think of you losing your oldest son. I know (but cannot really know) how hard that must be on you. It is a pain that never ends I am sure.
    God bless you. That was a wonderful tribute that your son wrote about you. You did something right there, Mom and Dad! xo Diana

  4. I saw that message from Tim come through FB, and it sure made me curious. I'm glad that he's okay, and hope that all will be well eventually.

  5. Melanie, I am so sorry to hear you and your family have been going through some hard times lately. My girls are grown now, with children of their own. Still, when they hurt, we hurt, and it will always be that way. My oldest daughter is still mourning at the loss of her sweet husband, whom we loved him as if he were our own son. We all are grieving, but I know the pain is so much deeper for her and the three children. I will pray for you and your family and that the tests that your husband is having will bring only good news.

  6. Melanie,
    No matter how old our children are, they are still our kids and the worry for their welfare is always paramount. I am sending you many loving prayers this morning for comfort.
    God Bless you sweet one.

  7. I hope Tim is alright, and pray for good news for Brian with his tests. What a roller coaster ride life is sometimes. It is such a comfort to be able to get and give support as a family. I'm keeping you all in my thoughts.

  8. There is so much truth in your son's message. Sending prayers your way, Melanie

  9. It sounds like a lovely day with your girlfriends, Melanie. I'm sorry things went downhill from there with the call from your son. I hope all is well and things are looking brighter each day. Sending you a big hug.

  10. Oh dear Melanie ~ Love is a wonderful thing. You give and you receive. I'm glad that things are a little better with T and I hope all ends well and that he keeps growing into a more wonderful young man.

    Praying for Brian.

    Love, hugs & prayers ~ FlowerLady

  11. I am so sorry that you have had horrid things happening, I do hope that it is something that is now past and that things will look up again very soon. Your son is obviously a great young man, in no small part due to his great parents. I am glad that your friends and family have supported you and your son, that is good. Hugs and all good thoughts to you. xx

  12. Gosh, I don't know how people make it through life without family, but many do. As long as everyone is going to be okay in the future, we can find the strength to hold up. I know you can never recover fully from the death of Philip, but you stand up every day and go on with dignity and endurance because your soul is, I think, very close to the heart of God.
    Your pal,

  13. Oh Melanie, I am sending you positive thoughts and prayers that all is right again very soon, for you, your son and your husband. When your loved ones are suffering it is very hard. I am glad you had your mom for comfort. Doesn't matter how old we are, sometimes we all just need mom...

  14. You have made it through the worst; together you will make it through 2016. Many blessings to you 3, Mary

  15. Hope your family is doing okay. It's so difficult to see your kids hurting! Thinking of you and sending you love and positive thoughts!

  16. Yes you will get through this as you have before. A family together is strong. I've never had to face the hardest thing a mother can as you did with the loss of your other son but I know from personal experience how much it hurts to see your kids go through difficult troubles, no matter their age. We'd rather bad things happen to ourselves, wouldn't we? Who was it--I read it just the other day but can't remember--that said, "The only way out, is through." And that is always hard.

    Your night out with girlfriends was special. Be sure you continue to nourish yourself every way you can.

    Thinking of you,

  17. I'm sorry that Tim is going through a difficult time. I hope everything turns out okay for him, and also for your husband with his testing. Thinking of all of you. Happy Easter! Take care and enjoy the day together.

  18. Mel - Just got around to catch up on some blogs. Sorry your week has been difficult. Praying for Tim and the test and for peace for you.

    Have a very blessed Easter.


  19. I hope that whatever happened with Tim sorts itself out positively. And that Tim's test results will turn out to be nothing unusual. Walking certainly does help me to sort through thoughts. More often than not, worries melt away and my mind becomes still while I'm out there putting one foot in front of the other. Take care, Tammy

  20. When our kids hurt, we hurt. Hope things continue to improve. Also hope your husband gets good news.

  21. I'm so late reading that post. I do hope things are better and that you found words to help your son... A mom is so important when thigns are rough.


Thank you for taking the time to leave a kind comment - I read and appreciate each one!